Meet
The Idiot Sportsmen
The
Early Years
The First Fishing Trips
Fish in the Boat--Finally
Chuck Gets a Boat
A Nest of Starlings and the Great Tuna Carnage
| After many years of self-denial (not a natural trait for any of the IS), Chuck finally got the boat of his dreams--a vintage Grady-White Gulfstream. He keeps it at the Londontowne Marina on the South River, near his home outside Baltimore, five minutes on a calm day from Thomas Point Light. From here Chuck can range north to the Bay Bridge and Sandy Point Light, east to the Eastern Bay and Bloody Point Light, and south to the Gas Docks and Chesapeake Beach. |  |
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Well, he can range there, but sometimes he needs a little help getting back. This was the case on an early IS outing in his new boat when the engine failed to start and the kicker (which hadn't been tested since the purchase) proved recalcitrant. |
| Good thing the boat has full electronics and a good radio, not to mention the ever-present cell phones the IS have, with age and painful experience, learned to carry on all outings. |  |
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Being, well, Idiot Sportsmen, the IS usually forget to take cameras on their fishing outings, but as luck would have it Mark remembered his that day and recorded these moments for posterity. |
| As they approached the harbor, Bart sensed it would be important to remember the exact dialogue that transpired at the dock between Chuck and the tow boat captain. |  |
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Chuck: "How much is this going to be?" Tow Captain: "If you have to ask, sir, you shouldn't own a boat." |
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Tow Captain: "Will that be Visa or MasterCard?" Chuck: (to Mark as the sound of shutter clicks becomes deafening) "You don't have to be doing this, asshole." |
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Tow Captain: "Why are those guys laughing so hard? Are they friends of yours?" Chuck: "Sort of." Tow Captain: "You're going to have to let go of the card, sir." |
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Tow Captain: "It's hard for me to watch someone be humiliated like this." Chuck: "Let's just get it over with. Where do I sign?" |
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